Your Complete Intro to BDSM Culture (Part 1)
Your Complete Intro To BDSM Culture
A Three-Part Series, part 1 of 3
BDSM is basically a power exchange between two consenting adults, involving role play, bondage, implements and different dynamics.
It is about being yourself and not having to hide who you are and what you like some people have to in their everyday lives. Your Complete Intro To BDSM Culture:
BDSM is quite often misconstrued and misunderstood and some of the community at large has a lot of prejudices because of this. There is a lack of information around for the everyday Joe, causing poor understanding and misconceptions of what we like, want, do and who we are as people.
In the BDSM community, you will come across a wide range of colourful personalities. You will meet Dominants, Submissives, Pets and more. People within the BDSM scene will have different roles they play and within these roles, everybody will have different likes and dislikes. If you don’t like something that is fine but don’t shame others for liking it.
‘Your kink isn’t my kink, and that’s okay.’
You will meet people of different sexual orientations and gender orientations. Being open and respectful is important for making friends and sustaining relationships. It is important to know people's private lives and public roles are separate. Somebody can be a good parent, a hard worker and a BDSM scene member. It is also important in the scene to respect people's privacy when it comes to the separation of these persons.
Some people will start to explore the BDSM life with a partner, with a friend or maybe alone. It doesn’t really matter how you enter the BDSM scene, the only important thing is that you enjoy your journey and you are safe.
BDSM is a subculture that is centred around trust, self-discovery, shared experiences and interests.
To make sure you’re journey is a safe one there is some basic information and guidelines that can help guide you. Let’s start with the important stuff and essential concepts.
BDSM– stands for
B– Bondage - B&D – Bondage & discipline.
D– Discipline - Dominance - D&S – Dominance & Submission.
S– Submission - Sadist - S&M – Sadist & Masochist.
M– Masochist
BDSM covers a wide range of activities and relationship types; there is no right way to explore your interests. As long as all parties involved are consenting and safe.
Most people and organizations in the scene follow these basic guideline acronyms as a basis, beginners and veterans alike.
RACK (Risk, Aware, Consensual, Kink)
R&A Risk and Awareness.
Basically, this means before you engage in an activity you need to be aware of the risks that could occur. With this, you need to have contingencies in place in case something goes wrong.
This could be as simple as making sure you have access to basic first aid if required. Every type of play activity could have different outcomes so thinking about that first is important.
C&K Consensual Kink
This is pretty self-explanatory. Consent is the number one rule, guideline, and expectation in the scene. Consent in the everyday context generally refers to sexual activities and people actively wanting or not wanting to engage in said activity. In the BDSM community, this is extended to not only include sexual activities but also all BDSM activities; including but not limited to impact play, edge play, medical play, and more. In the scene it is important to not touch anything or anybody that is not yours without permission, it is important to also remember some people are the property of their partner too.
SSC (Safe, Sane, Consensual)
This is another basic principle in the scene. Similar to RACK, SSC is about being safe, aware of your actions, and conscious of the repercussions of those actions. Again Consent is brought up. Consent is extremely essential to strong relationships, not injuring or offending people, and following basic protocols within the scene.
Something I always like to add is TRUST.
Trust is super important. It’s important for friendships, sexual relationships and play relationships. It is important as a Top to have trust in your bottom to trust they are going to tell you if something is right or wrong and more. Bottoms need to trust Tops they play with that they are going to follow their limits and not violate their consent.
Don’t be afraid to say “I don’t know”, nobody knows everything, and asking a question or referring people to somebody who does know, is a better option. That way nobody gets hurt and knowledge gets passed on.
