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What Are The Must Have Kink Accessories

A Kinkster's Advice On Dressing Down.

The fetish community is driven by a shared love of fetishism and can be an inclusive space without some of the barriers often seen in the daily world. It’s one place you may find a stereotypically masculine looking person in full Leathers having a wholesome conversation with someone who is wearing nothing but a bright rubber thong, knee length, high heel boots and glitter in their beard, but you may be surprised to find out which of the two is actually the more dominant.

As someone male-identifying with traditionally masculine traits, I’ve always found my groove in any space I set foot into. I’ve never needed to define my own masculinity, yet for some, it’s a daily battle, and this is where the fetish community plays a vital role. 

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Getting involved with the fetish community has helped me redefine the way I view masculinity and dominance and how it can be different for everyone. Unlike most of the vanilla world, masculinity in the fetish world is not always defined by an individual’s appearance or gender identity. Even the most powerful and dominant looking person at a fetish event could be entirely submissive, and that’s absolutely accepted. 

From an outsider’s perspective, the fetish community can be seen as an intimidating place, in a space where leather, rubber, sex positivity and individual differences are openly celebrated. However, the visible sides often portray the wrong idea to those new or unfamiliar with the community. 

Fetish communities, for many involved, are a space to express individuality, looks or feelings irrespective of gender, race, social following or financial standing. It’s a space of freedom, where judgment is minimal, and everyone is out for a good time, without the constraint of day to day life. 

The gear worn in the fetish community is often thought to be necessary to define an individual’s standpoint, and that in itself can seem prohibitive. As I have become more involved, it has become very clear that the community exists for all people, and the ownership or wearing of any type of fetish gear is entirely optional. You don’t need to own rubber to be in the rubber community or have any leather to be into leather. So what’s all the gear for?

Textile fetishism has been around for a long time, and that’s what formed many current operating communities. Often materials such as latex, lycra or some uniform garments aren’t commonly accepted as daily attire. Yet, all textiles and headspaces are accepted to express personality, sexuality, or interest in the fetish community. So the gear is worn for the aesthetic appeal, the individuality, the way it feels on the body and in some cases, the way it conceals the wearers’ identity as a way of escapism from the daily grind of life.

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Being a typically masculine male, it’s a very liberating experience to walk into an event wearing nothing more than black, skin-tight latex and bright coloured accessories. Social nights like these with people from all sexual orientations wearing whatever they’ve chosen to express themselves are well worth attending. In this space, masculinity and femininity mix unlike any other space I’ve been involved in; I’ve now realised it’s not something to get held up on or intimidated by.

The world of fetish is as open to you as it is to anyone; all that’s needed is an open mind to treat everyone with respect and to help create a safe, inclusive space. So wear what you want and add your own flair and individuality to it. As I always say, “You do You.”

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