Alright, let us talk about premature ejaculation!
This is an issue that affects over 31% of Australian people who own a penis! let’s just get that out there, you are not alone this is an issue that almost of third of your friends are dealing with as well. Unfortunately, because most people won’t talk about this issue it creates a stigma that tends to exacerbate the issue!
Premature ejaculation (PE) is mostly caused by anxiety and in most cases is actually quite easy to treat!
Firstly, what is PE:
Well to quote the Harvard Medical School
“Premature ejaculation occurs when a man [person with a penis] reaches orgasm and ejaculates too quickly and without control. In other words, ejaculation occurs before a man [person with a penis] wants it to happen. It may occur before or after beginning foreplay or intercourse.”
The average time from the start of stimulation to PE is around 1 – 2 minutes, this can have a massive effect on a sexual relationship reducing sexual pleasure for you and your partner and having a lasting effect on your self-esteem! The main cause for PE in most cases is Anxiety, specifically Anxiety around performance and sexual rejection. If you are in a relationship the best thing to do is talk to your partner about how PE makes you feel. You might find that your partner is super supportive and that in itself might start to ease some of the stress.
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Another great way to relieve some performance anxiety is to make your partner climax before you start to stimulate your penis! This will instantly relieve your performance anxiety and you can relax and take your time with the rest of the show! You might want to use a small vibrator or perform oral sex, once your partner has had their fill you will feel less expectation to perform helping you last a lot longer, and removing some of that anxious (unnecessary) guilt when things don’t go according to plan.
Another great treatment is called behavioral therapy! This can be done in several ways:
The Squeeze Technique:
The squeeze technique is performed just before climax, as soon as you feel climax approaching stop stimulation and either you or your partner place a thumb and two fingers squeezing the shaft lightly just below the head of the penis for about 20 seconds or until the feeling of impending climax ends. This can be done many times during intercourse and eventually, you will regain the ability to control your climax.
Edging is a great way to learn to control your climax and ejaculation. The idea is simple and can be practiced during sex or during solo masturbation! Basically if you feel your self about to reach climax just stop stimulating/stroking! And mentally focus on not ejaculating. You can do this with your hands or with a vibrating stroker to increase stimulation! Repeat the process over and over every time you masturbate or have sex and soon you will gain the ability to control your climax better!
There are many products on the market to help with all sorts of sexual issues such as PE:
-Cock Rings or C-rings are a great product and come in all shapes and sizes! They are safe to use and in most cases and help with stronger and harder erections and can also help with PE, Check out our blog on how C-rings can help you achieve a more rewarding sex life.
-Penis Pumps are another product with HUGE sexual health benefits for PE and erectile dysfunction! Pumping is a great exercise for erection health and can also help with post prostate surgery side effects such as PE and ED and overall sexual confidence! Check out our blog on pumping and see for your self
-Delay sprays and gels are another great way to increase sexual stamina! A delay gell like the JO Prolonger is a numbing gel that can desensitize overly sensitive penises! This is a great option for penises that are “intact” as they tend to be more sensitive than circumcised penises. Another great product is the PJUR Superhero delay products and the [ON] Bold delay Spray.
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A few helpful hints to add to all this;
Don’t watch so much porn! Porn is great! We love porn but to much porn can give you an unrealistic expectation of your partner and sex in general! This may cause low libido, and cause problems with performance.
Remember to breathe, holding your breath is something a lot of people do during sex and it’s a great way it increases arousal but it's important to pace your self remember to breathe regularly and deeply during sex get your blood and body oxygenated!
Try to focus on something else rather than your tendency to cum early! Sometimes thinking about your shopping list or all those bills you need to pay is a great way to turn your self off just enough to keep going.
Use condoms! Condoms are a great way to desensitize yourself. It’s also a good way to promote safe and healthy sex and reduce the risk of unwanted pregnancy and the spreading and STI’s.
If you have tried a few of these steps and your still having issues, then it's best to visit your GP, be honest about your experiences and see what they have to say, don’t forget to keep the communication with your sexual partner going! Honestly just talking about it can be so beneficial and helpful!
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